Alone in the bathroom

What do you get when your 3 year old is left unsupervised in your bathroom for a few minutes? You get High-Endurance-Carmex-head. Curious to know what High Endurance-Carmex-head is? Well, let me explain.........

It started mid-afternoon when Landis announced, "Mommy!! I hafta' go PEE-PEE!!!" His announcement didn't come as a suprise, since for the previous 5 minutes I'd been watching him do the squirmy, shifty, pee-pee dance, that I think is universal to all little kids. "Well then go" I told him.

He's perfectly capable of going to the potty by himself, but we never fail to have that little exchange first. It's our routine. He holds it as long as he possibly can, does the dance, makes the announcement, and then I tell him to go ahead and go. Yesterday was no different.

So, he went. But he was gone for an unusually long time. Longer than it takes him on a regular basis. So I went to check on him, thinking maybe he got in there and realized he had more business to take care of than he originally thought. (Though I do have to admit that that scenario would be uncommon. If the status of what he has to do changes, he usually comes out and tells me. Gives me an update, if you will. Because like I said before, he enjoys the routine.)

I got into the bathroom and there he stood -- looking into the mirror at my sink.
"Landis, are you done?" I asked.
"Yep." he replied.
"Did you flush?" I asked.
"Yep." he replied.
"Did you wash your hands?" I asked.
"Yep." he replied.

And then I caught a faint whiff. A whiff of something I couldn't quite put my finger on. I got closer to him. The smell got stronger. And then I saw the small jar of Carmex sitting on my counter. So that was it...... The slightly medicinal smell of Carmex.

"Landis, did you put some Carmex on your lips?" I asked him.
"No," he replied. "I put it in my hair!"

I stood over him so I could have a good look. And there it was -- an unmistakable grease-spot of Carmex all over the top of his head. But there was something else too..... He was even more fragrant close up. I gave him a good sniff, and then I realized what it was.

"Landis, did you put daddy's deodorant in your hair too?"
"Yes!" he exclaimed. He was quite proud of himself.
"Why in the world did you put that stuff in your hair?" I asked him.
"I'm making it pretty!!" he replied. "Don't I look pretty?!"
"You look beautiful" I reassured him, as I ushered him out of the bathroom, "but how 'bout we don't put anymore Carmex or deodorant in the hair, OK?"

He agreed to stop using either as a hair product, and we jumped into the car to go pick up his brother from Kindergarten. And even though he reeked of Old Spice High Endurance, there was nothing I could do about it. Because as luck would have it, due to our time-constraints a good hair washing was completely out of the question. Which I have to say was pretty darn unfortunate. Because, aside from the fact that continuously sniffing an exorbitant amount of Old Spice in a small enclosed space can make one a tad nauseous, there is also something downright disturbing about a 3 year old who smells like a 36 year old man.